After my manic episode nearly ten years ago, I went to an outpatient facility for a few weeks. My prick of a psychiatrist discharged me without first consulting my parents. I was nineteen, so legally an adult. However, I behaved like an eight-year-old at best in the aftermath of my psychotic break. I had no …
The cost of mental health
I got laid off back in March. Somehow, the company had incredible foresight and laid off about 100 employees right before COVID-19 caused all the shutdowns. For five months, I lived on the severance my company gave me and my writing and editing side hustle. Things became a little more desperate in August, and on …
Nine years and many more to come
Nine years ago, almost down to the minute, I received a call from my dad about Ray Hardin passing away. He’d been fighting lung cancer, and we knew the end was near. That didn’t keep the shock of his death from hitting me in the face. The previous Monday, I’d had my wisdom teeth removed. …
Mania
About a week ago, I went to church with my mom and dad. During bible class, our preacher asked the young people in the room what our parents did that made us feel good. I thought it was an odd question, as did my mom. He provided us with slips of paper on which to …
Vulnerability
A few months ago, one of the minsters at my church asked me to make a video for the online service that week. (We are still meeting virtually thanks to COVID.) He asked me to talk about my mental health journey. I’d been itching to tell my story, so I gladly accepted. I wrote a …
For mood!
In a little over two weeks, I will celebrate what I call my bipolar birthday. August 22, 2011 was my first day of mania, followed soon by a psychotic break. Ah! Such fond memories (not). I cannot believe it’s been nine years! For nine years, I’ve taken Geodon and Lamictal every night (except a few …
Mental illness is not a sign of weakness, neither is taking medicine
Since my bipolar diagnosis when I was 19, I have read several books by people who are also bipolar. Often, the memoirs are filled with tragic and scary stories. One of the books I’ve read is called Life is Like a Line. I cannot remember much about the book. I do know that it has …
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Dr. Q
Almost eight years ago, I went 80 or so hours without sleep and had a psychotic break. I was diagnosed as bipolar and started going to an outpatient hospital (that’s the extremely truncated version—this post isn’t about that). I was assigned a psychiatrist. The guy was an asshole. I was technically an adult, but I …
I love my meds!
When I was first diagnosed as bipolar, I was not happy about having to take medicine. I didn’t exactly refuse to take it, but I did bitch and moan about it for a while. My sister is also bipolar, and she’d been on some medicine for several years that worked really well for her. My …
Medicine’s unjust stigma
Bipolar and other mental illnesses have a stigma surrounding them, but they are more understood now than they were thirty years ago. One place, though, seems to be stuck in the dark ages. The church. Thankfully, I haven’t experienced too much criticism from my church family, but not everyone there knows about my illness. I’ve …
Between Two Poles 